Sex should be fun, but it can also be complicated. Welcome to Sexual Resolution , a biweekly column by sex therapist Vanessa Marin to answer your most confidential questions and help you achieve a healthy, joyful sex life. In this edition, she answers a reader who wants to have anal sex but whose partner has a big penis. She's nervous about the potential for pain, but Vanessa has some helpful tips.

Takeaway: Pain is the major reason people don't do more butt stuff. Fortunately, it's often avoidable. What is the first thing you think about when someone mentions anal sex? Is it untold pleasure? Is it sensuous closeness? Is it discovering unknown intimacy?

Talk to your partner about the prospect. Also, the "accidentally-slipping-it-in" move is an asshole thing to do. You can cause serious damage by pulling a stunt like that. Considering the nightmare that can come out of there after a night at a Mexican buffet, I can see how people would think that. It makes clean-up that much easier.

We checked in with some experts and asked them to take the mystery out of anal sex , and they schooled us on some positions that can help ease you into your first time to actually make it an enjoyable experience. In the traditional cowgirl position, your partner lies down while you mount on top — yeehaw! As the partner on top, you can ease into anal penetration by moving up or down as needed.